Posts Tagged ‘Humor

25
Apr
13

Today’s Spike Milligan Quote

Rommel gunner who

From “Rommel?” “Gunner who?”second volume of his war memoirs:

Driver Shepherd and I had been detailed to drive Lt. Budden in the wireless truck. We had been standing by it for an hour and nothing happened but it happened frequently. Despatch Riders raced up and down the column shouting “Fuck everybody” but that was all. We started to brew tea, when Lt. Budden’s iron frame glasses appear round the truck. “Look damn you! You’re supposed to be standing by your vehicles.”

“Sorry, sir. I’ll say three Hail Marys.”

“Give me a cup and I’ll say no more about it,” he said, producing a cup from behind his back.

Lt. Budden flags down a D.R. “What’s the hold up?”

“I’ll tell you sir. I’m the D.R. who follows the D.R. up in front with a message that cancels out his message.”

A cloud of dust is approaching at high speed. From its nucleus formidable swearing is issuing. It’s our Signal Sgt Dawson, “Get mounted, we’re off” it bellows as it goes down the line, followed by mocking cheers. I jump in, engines are coming to life. the hood is rolled back so Budden can stand Caesar-like in the passenger seat. Shouts are heard above the sound of engines revving. “Right Milligan,” says Lt. Budden. “World War 2 at 25 m.p.h.” He looked back at the long line of vehicles. “My god, what a target for the Luftwaffe.”

“Don’t worry, sir. I have a verbal anti-aircraft curse that brings down planes.”

“Keep talking Milligan, I think I can get you out on Mental Grounds.”

“That’s how I got in, sir.”

“Didn’t we all.”

 

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The Ministry of Culture is a blog (duh!) about whatever interests me, a professional journalist. It looks at current events, culture -- rock & roll, literature, roller derby, opera, comedy -- military history and whatever else crosses my path. All opinions are my own.

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